Just Wondering

[jazzy_dave]

Have you done anything stupid and regretted it later?

Has something or someone made you so mad that you have, metaphorically, exploded?

What techniques do you use to stay calm?

Comments

[christopher575.livejournal.com]

Yes, but I've also arrived at a really great place in life and realize I wouldn't be where I am today if it weren't for my mistakes and failures as well as my triumphs.

For sure, yes.

Walking and hiking. I also decided a long time ago to keep basically the same people around across most social media platforms so I won't be tempted to discuss stupid things online. People thing "venting" online helps them but I see it as a form of wallowing. While it's still tempting to do it, I've upped my accountability to the point that it's always easy not to.

[qatsi.livejournal.com]

This.

[lilchiva.livejournal.com]

For all the above, I meditate, try to take care of my health, and practice the art of letting go. This doesn't help you in the moment, when you've already lost your head, but cumulatively these are the things that works the best for me. Much of the issue with "losing it" and "regret" is how you think about it and psychologically attaching it to your flight or fight CNS mechanisms. So, reading any decent book about emotional management will help with how you think about stuff, which leads to not getting angry about stuff to begin with.

For after I am already "engaged", I walk away and do deep breathing exercises + letting go techniques. I found very little that helps in the moment. But, I come from volatile people. Other people might have better luck with "in the moment" techniques.

[ravena-kade.livejournal.com]

Yes. Sadly, I regret buying this house.

Yes. An old fried accused me of just using her for her car. We had been friends for 24 years and I put up with a ton of self centered crap...and suffered through being her Maid of Honor at her wedding and the rest of the bridal party was all children so I had to pay for everything. I did this because we were friends... and helped her with house stuff, job stuff, listened to husband woes...so when she hit me with that I exploded. I was at work and it was a nasty email. I walked away as I was insulted to my core. I have taken myself to Emergency Wards by train rather than ask anyone for a ride. To this day I have to really trust someone to take a ride from them.

I went to cognitive behavior therapy to help with a neurological condition I have and I find that avoiding things that stress me out before it can happen is the best. Breathing exercises dont really help and while diving into ice cream may work, it is not healthy. The best thing is to go out and try and be with other people.

[bobby1933.livejournal.com]

The questions are all related.

2) When i was eleven, a group of older boys often provoked a fight between me and a Thlinket boy about my age and size. I don't know how they did it, but they made our combat seem inevitable. We both emerged tired, bloody, injured, confused and angry. This situation was repeated several times with the older boys cheering us on with racist remarks.

!) I almost killed this boy when i threw a rock at him while he was fishing at the edge of a waterfall/rapids.

3) We later became friends, But i had issues with authority (no one is ever again going to tell me what to do!) anger. and race through much of my early adulthood. I still take extreme views on authority, violence, and race. I am an anarchist, a pacifist, and have an intense dislike for any expression of racism. The anger gradually seemed to subside as i matured spiritually, but i still have to watch myself and recognize that whatever i am angry at is only a small part of the problem. Most of the problem is my internal tendency to become angry. Recognizing this i can laugh at myself rather than get upset about the stimulus.

[a-phoenixdragon.livejournal.com]

Lots of times, lol!!

A few times. See above, lol!

I wish I had some that worked. Alas, I'm usually too busy NOT being calm to think of ways to BE calm!

*HUGS*

[wantedonvoyage.livejournal.com]

One thing that comes to mind only because I thought about it on Sunday:

I donated something to a church rummage sale without knowing how valuable it was, which wouldn't have bothered me so much if a.) I didn't find out that someone I know, who knew what it was worth, took it home without paying for it, and b.) now I wish I still had it. That did make me really angry! I don't see this person anymore but every time I hear his name I stew about it; more my own stupidity than his greed.

Isolate, lift weights, punk music.

[thespian15.livejournal.com]

Oh have I done a stupid thing. :o
Never sleep with a stripper.

When I was a kid I had a fight with my older brother and I some how got him down on the floor and held a pair of sissors on him. :o

I internalize, which is probably a stupid thing to do. :o
Hugs, Jon

[davesmusictank.livejournal.com]

Sometimes you need to let it out.

[thespian15.livejournal.com]

I told one of my nurses one time, you can tell if I am in a bad mood/pissed if I get really quiet. lol........

[dark-phoenix54.livejournal.com]

I'm 61; of COURSE I've done LOTS of stupid things and regretted them! (including a 17 year first marriage)

I've rarely exploded, but I do get to a point where I become sarcastic and bitchy. I think I've only actually exploded once. A man we did some house painting for made it clear he was not going to pay us the full amount, just because. He and I (a great big dude) got into a screaming fight, literally right in each other's faces. Well, my face was at his chest level, but we were toe to toe. To this day I''m surprised he didn't hit me. He bullied his entire family, so I'm not surprised (at this point, looking back) that he screwed us over. His family was SO EMBARRESSED.

Try to remember to breathe. Ground and center.

[sidhe-uaine42.livejournal.com]

1) Alas, yes. Several times

2) Have you been keeping up on the United States election? The Republican ticket in particular?

3) I keep telling myself that if I did something stupid, what's going to happen to my furred managers? I have to just watch them being themselves, and I just melt

[davesmusictank.livejournal.com]

Yes i have been following what the Republicans have been up to.

[ba1126.livejournal.com]

Too many times!! My biggest challenge is when my nanny job involves going to a new place to pick up nanny girl. Just yesterday she asked me to go and get her from a train stop two towns over. I got hopelessly lost and Hubby had to rescue me, while someone else did the pickup!!

[ba1126.livejournal.com]

As to someone, something making me mad, The last time I recall was on my previous nanny job. The three year old was getting more and more obstinate and defiant as he grew. For example,he spit in my face while I was buckling him into his car seat! The :last straw was him trying to kick me while I was trying to prepare his sister for her dance recital. I called his Mom and said "You need to come home NOW!! I am not taking any more of his abuse!!" I left that job and got a BETTER one!